Howdy folks!
It's your crusty commish here, back with a good old fashioned recap after taking a couple weeks off to focus on the MLB Playoffs. (Who won the World Series? Did anyone hear?)
Meanwhile, in Chicken Bone land, we're starting to enter the homestretch. The four teams at the top will be holding on for dear life, while the five teams behind them are looking to make a charge. (The less said about Thong the better. No need to kick an Auction Bitch when he's down.) So let's recap all the Week 9 action...
Commish 135 - Thong 64
Finally, Devonta Smith comes up with a huge game and scores 20 points! What's that you say? That he was on my bench because I was sick of his underperforming? That I wouldn't know a non-Kupp starting wide receiver if he was standing in the end-zone and waving at me? That when the epitaph on my season is written, it'll say I cut Jalen Waddle and Cole Beasley and kept Julio Junk and Crap Claypool for no discernable reason? You'd say all that, would you? Well, that's just rude.
Does Deon Sanders still play Wide Receiver? Maybe I'll pick him up. He was also an Atlanta Brave, ya know..
Maine 111 - Mazzle 85
Don't look now, but Maine has won 3 out of his last 4 and is starting to look feisty. Even with a COVID-ridden, lying, super sketchy Aaron Rodgers on the bench and the Packers held to one TD, Maine still managed to put up a decent score and beat up on Mazzle. .. I'm assuming Mazzle - who is still 6-3 and in good shape - was just distracted this week in Atlanta by the shouts of joy from his neighborhood on Tuesday, the parade on Friday, etc...
Sausage 117 - Falafel 114
This delicious matchup came down to the last two minutes on Monday night, but Travis's reverse-jinx came up just short when Dionte Johnson finally got open for a long gain on the last drive. The whole Pittsburgh Steelers offense felt kind of like this...
A couple more notes on this one:
- With the narrow victory, Sean takes over sole possession of first place at 7-2. And with a full 3 game lead over the 5th place teams with five weeks to play, he's in annoyingly great shape for yet another playoff berth.
- Travis is also in excellent shape at 6-3 and with the most total points scored in the league. But seeing James Connor putting up 37 points on his bench has got to stick in his craw.
Mike Cole 103 - Extra Billy 74
A few short weeks ago in this space, we anointed Robby #1 in the Power Rankings. Since then, he has lost 3 in a row, has not scored more than 78 points, and has lost Derrick Henry for the season. I've NEVER seen someone's season go into the toilet this fast. It's crazy. So on a totally unrelated note, here's a quick power rankings for this week, that should in no way jinx anyone:
10: Thong
9: MCole
8. Robby
7. MFrank
6. Steve
5. Maine
4. Commish
3. Mazzle
1 (tie). Sausage and Falafel
Mike Frank 122 - Steve 57
Rabbi Frank kicked some kosher ass this week, thanks to a big game from Elijah Moore. You know he's all about those New York Jets players! .. On the flip side, while Steve's luck improved when he managed to win the last two weeks with scores of 89 and 99, this week he power bottomed out. (Also, his new team name of "Baldwin's Bullets" is both very funny and a total rip-off my of original "Ballston Bullets" team name.) Overall it was a real stinker of a week for Steve. But remember, if you change the letters around in stinker, you get...
That's all I got for now. Good luck down the stretch everyone - in any year, ya just never know who's going to win it all...
Cheers,
- The Commish
